Since my last blog I am feeling in a better place. God is teaching me that it’s ok when everything is stripped back and laid bare. Submitting to his will, however impossible it seems,  is the only way for true contentment in him. I am slowly grasping this and asking God that I won’t fight against it any more.

Before I opened my eyes this morning I was praying a hymn by a lady called Frances Havergal. I pray that I will be able to make the words of this hymn my own with God’s grace;

1. Take my life and let it be

Consecrated, Lord, to Thee.

Take my moments and my days,

Let them flow in endless praise.

2. Take my hands and let them move

At the impulse of Thy love.

Take my feet and let them be

Swift and beautiful for Thee.

3. Take my voice and let me sing,

Always, only for my King.

 Take my lips and let them be

Filled with messages from Thee.

4. Take my silver and my gold,

Not a mite would I withhold.

Take my intellect and use

Every pow’r as Thou shalt choose.

5. Take my will and make it Thine,

It shall be no longer mine.

Take my heart, it is Thine own,

It shall be Thy royal throne.

6. Take my love, my Lord, I pour

At Thy feet its treasure store.

Take myself and I will be

Ever, only, all for Thee.

When darkness veils His lovely face,

I rest on His unchanging grace;

In every high and stormy gale

My anchor holds within the veil.

On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;

All other ground is sinking sand.

Submitting to God is the only way, and I pray that as we walk with Christ at the centre of our lives we will bring him glory. Then we will be at our happiest and most fulfilled. 

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2 thoughts on “Nothing held back. 

  1. kaycutting

    Hello Natalie

    I really appreciate reading your posts – I’m sure you could write a book one day.

    Today’s post I had to comment on. Take my life was the prayer I prayed when I became a Christian in 1976.

    The song about the anchor has held me fast this past year through many difficult days. There is an anchor photo on my Facebook wall together with the verse from Faithful one which also speaks about the Anchor.

    Hang in there – you are doing so well. God IS faithful – He has good things in store.

    Lots of love

    Kay xxx

    >

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  2. Karen

    Hello,
    I have to confess that this is the first time I have read your blog despite being aware of it since April. There has always been something else to do at that moment in the day and then it is forgotten until the next day and so it goes on. I’m sorry about that, I would have liked to have replied to each blog and shared my own thoughts with you along the way but I am glad to be able to do so now. The Christian songs you include happen to be some of my favorites and songs I feel are anointed and always move me in some way when sung. When reading through some of your blogs I was reminded of a special song by Steven Curtis Chapman from his The Glorious Unfolding CD, track 12. The words are as follows: “At the feet of Jesus I will lay my burdens down, I will lay my heavy burdens down. In the stillness I can hear my Saviour calling out, come to me and lay your burdens down. So I will lay down my struggles, I will lay down my shame, all the fear I drag around through this life, like a ball and chain – chorus – and I will sing hallelujah to the One who sets me free, and you will find me at the feet of Jesus, you will find me at the feet of Jesus. In the arms of Jesus I will find my peace and rest, I hear him calling come to me and rest. Carried by my shepherd, cradled tightly to his chest, there and there alone my soul finds rest. So I will rest in the shelter of my Saviour’s embrace, hidden safely in the refuge of his mercy and his grace – chorus – and I will sing hallelujah to the One who sets me free, and you will fine me in the arms of Jesus……….” I believe the only way we can survive this side of eternity is to bring it all to Jesus. Jesus said in Matthew 11:28-30, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened. and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls……” And oh how our souls need rest sometimes and yet we find it hard, why is that? As a practical and independent person Jesus is often my last resort but when I finally hand my concerns over to him my soul does indeed find rest? I think when we neglect to give God fully our sadness and our fears we neglect ourselves and I think pride often gets in the way of us bringing it all to Him. I know what you mean about trying to fix things, even the impossible, and yet we persist in trying to do so before finally giving up exhausted. It is a wonderful and precious lesson to learn to trust our impossible to God for whom nothing is impossible. The prophet Isaiah says in Isa 46:4, “I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you”.

    In one of your blogs you mention your regular prayer to God over the years asking him to help you both live lives that are honoring to him and you mention questioning God over why he did not answer those prayers and why He let sin damage what you had dedicated your lives to. And it’s a fair question. Although it’s difficult to suggest that God allowed it to happen, I sense you are saying that this is what it took for God to deal with the personal issues you speak of and that, rightly so, God is able to also comfort and grow those in the church and in your family who are also suffering, as long as they are willing to trust him and search for what He is wanting to communicate to them through what has happened.

    Dying to self! What a daily challenge and one I have yet to truly master but we are not asked to do it on our own. We can only do it with the empowering of the Holy Spirit, it is a spiritual act. it is something I have become more aware of recently and if I’m honest I feel I often fall short. I won’t pretend to know what you have and are going through, I can only imagine. But I do know that you are going to win the battle you are in because you are learning so much, about the lies of Satan, about yourself, that the only option for survival is forgiveness, that you can’t fix things for everyone and that they are on their own journey and have God to help them, that you have to give all your cares to Jesus and that you must trust Him and, through all these things you will be transformed and you will know joy as well as sadness. I hope and pray you will continue to lay your burdens down and that your soul will find rest. XX

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